As the holiday season winds down and we descend from the euphoric December highs and morph back into the bloodthirsty savages most civilized countries think we are, I think there is no better time to engage in America’s favorite pastime…finding someone to blame. The root of our problem is that we have turned everything into a battle and if it’s not a ‘good guys vs. bad guys” theme, it’s at least an “us vs. them” situation and when in doubt I always…blame the media. I’m always telling newscasters, usually by yelling at my TV so I’m not sure they hear me, to stop giving us opinions and just give us facts because we think you’re all idiots. We wouldn’t let you babysit our children, date our sons or daughters and we’d ask for a second opinion if you told us the sky was blue and lately, waiting for you to get to the point is like watching a snowman die. These days I can get more useful information watching an episode of Hoarders.
Truth be told I can’t even blame this generation because in the mid-70s TV gave us the Battle of the Network Stars which began this flushing spiral we call TV. TV would put together the most inept, uncoordinated group of stars from one network and pit them against a similar group of inept, uncoordinated stars from another network and call it a “battle” although that’s a pretty generous use of the word since there were no lives dependent on Farrah Fawcett’s inability to bowl or William Shatner not drowning as he tried to get from one end of the pool to the other. This idiocy with celebrities led to Splash, a diving competition among so-called celebrities which, because of all the injuries, did nothing but prove that celebrities couldn’t, in fact, hit water if they fell out of a boat.
The lack of success for this drivel did nothing to deter TV from its ultimate goal to dumb us into rocks which gave us the likes of Are You Smarter than a 5th Grader? and proved without a doubt that we are not. We have the Bachelor and Bachelorette which cast like 20 men or women trying to out lie each other to a man or woman who is lying to them. It’s like Truth or Dare without the truth.
There are some talent shows but those are also oddly skewed. I’m told Dancing with the Stars is very popular and it goes a step beyond learning that celebrities can’t dance. It has judges who I’ve never seen dance tell us how bad they were and then the masterstroke for TV is it lets America, who we know can’t dance, vote dancers off. Sure, that sounds fair. Vocal battles are big right now with America’s Got Talent, the Voice, X Factor etc. but you could have the best singing voice in the world and if you come up against an 11-year old girl in a wheelchair holding a puppet, you might as well buy your bus ticket back to Little Rock.
Cooking, probably because of its inherent boredom, has really tied itself to the competition bandwagon with shows like Cupcake Wars, Iron Chef, Celebrity Cook-Off, where we learn in addition to everything else, celebrities also can’t cook and Kids Baking Championship. The last one is particularly incongruous because you’ll have a kid trying to get his crème fraiche just right while he’s yelling for his Mommy to come tie his shoe. And unless someone comes up with a nuclear cupcake I’m not too worried about whose is best…as long as it has bacon in it. Iron Chef takes cooking to another level and if I ever had that many people in my kitchen, they are there to put out the fire. I’m watching the show from my couch with a bag of Cheetos and a Bud Lite so I don’t think sous vide is coming into play.
This said, in this season and during all seasons I refuse to believe everything has to be a battle with contestants vying for a bride, groom, crystal mushroom or golden buzzer and you’ll notice I haven’t mentioned Storage Wars because I don’t care that you paid $64 to buy an abandoned storage locker only to find it held the missing nude photos of Martha Washington.
IMC has in excess of 2,200 promotional products that will help you serve your client and we are adding new brand partners and products from our collections and our established retail brand partners. We believe IMC products speak for themselves and we can also show you ways to use and market them to your clients. Our products with decoration will have your customer coming back time and time again. Since introducing Waterford® Writing Instruments and MoMA years ago, IMC has presented more than 60 retail brands from global suppliers to enhance the selections you can offer your clients. We invite you to browse any of our 2,200+ products on the BRAND NEW IMC website to see items suitable for any occasion or event and pieces you can use to personalize your relationship with your clients. You can register as a distributor, track orders, upload art for virtual samples and even create your own flyers and catalogs of our products. IMC is preparing for PPAI 2019 in Las Vegas in January and we invite you to visit us in Booth 3751 to see our new retail brands and IMC Collections. The 2019 IMC catalog is available by request from the IMC website and is posted on the online services. The 2019 catalog has gone to print and will include new retail product and brands as well as additions to our IMC Collections. We’ll continue to treat our clients professionally and get your orders to you…on time and on budget. You can also request our 2019 catalog using the catalog page of our website or download the PDF. The IMC 2018.5 flyer is posted on our website and you can see those new products on our website and download a copy of the flyer. We have products for every event and if your client has invented a holiday or celebration, we can also custom-make almost anything you can dream to make your client’s event all it can be. Take a look at our YouTube channel to see some videos showcasing popular products for some ideas on how to use them. We take our business relationship seriously and we want you to enjoy, give and receive our products and be able to use them every day. We look forward to working with you and we always have ideas to make our products work for your clients. The 2018 IMC catalog remains live and available virtually at Zoomcatalog.com and on our website if you’re tired of fighting paper catalogs and it can be viewed nicely with your laptop, iPad, tablet or phone. IMC is the recognized leader in the introduction of new retail brands to the promotional product industry and has multiple design awards from both ASI and PPAI. We have promotional products for every event, show, convention, corporate store and company program that will keep your client looking to you for new ideas. What do you say…are you ready for a battle?