We had a going away/surprise/any excuse for a party function at the offices yesterday that I missed. It wasn’t a surprise that I missed it as apparently I’m too much of a party animal so they’ve taken to holding these on Thursday afternoons when they know I’ll be gone and oddly, I can’t even argue with their logic. I would certainly question the integrity of any party to which I’m invited.
And just to prove that no occasion to party is beneath us, the soiree was for a young man limping off to have a hip replaced. Until now I thought the party we had for him a couple of years ago when he left to have a knee replaced was the real low point. I don’t know how many of these I can miss but if he keeps coming apart like a five dollar watch, we’re going to need more paper plates. When did we become a society so out of things to do that we’ve begun to celebrate hospital stays? It’s bad enough we celebrate Talk like a Pirate day; do I now have to bake a cake every time someone breaks a nail? I’m having a colonoscopy next week but I don’t expect to see any balloons or glitter although when I wake up…somebody better have a cookie or be ready to live with the consequences.
Make no mistake…he needs this surgery and thankfully his body is still under warranty so he has to get it done now before he exceeds the mile limit. I can hear him walking up the stairs now and he sounds just like the burro I rode in the Grand Canyon. Seriously, right now he couldn’t sneak up on Helen Keller. After this surgery he can’t take stairs for a while and he’ll have to take his medical records every time he flies because when he limps through an airport scanner, it will go off like a Geiger counter in Chernobyl. On the plus side, he’s looking forward to the full-body pat down.
I’m told the event itself was a spectacle of hot dogs, popcorn and sugar…the trifecta of cholesterol hell. Many in the crowd thought he teared up when surprised by everyone. In reality, he teared up because in an embarrassing lack of sensitivity, he was now upstairs and they decided to have the function downstairs so while the thought of having to negotiate 21 stairs for a hot dog would have brought tears to the eyes of many a hardy soul, even more so for a guy who already walks like Yoda. I’ve included a shot of the dessert table just to demonstrate the economical attitude of my co-workers who plied him with sugar thinking, “You’re going to be in the hospital anyway. They can treat you for diabetes at the same time.”
Everyone did band together and get him a walker which will be of no value on the stairs except to give him something else to carry and I donated the tennis balls for it…just in case our insurance doesn’t cover them. They also got him the game Operation but since he’s having it done at the VA, I think he’s going to use it to test the doctors before they do the real thing because I know the guy who was the real life model for the game and the doctors usually scraped the edges when they were pulling parts out of him. In fact, the last time they successfully removed his elbow, his spleen gave them a standing ovation.
IMC has in excess of 2200 promotional products that will help you serve your client and we are adding new brand partners and products from our collections and our established retail brand partners. We believe IMC products speak for themselves and we can also show you ways to use and market them to your clients. Our products with decoration will have your customer coming back time and time again. Since introducing Waterford® Writing Instruments and MoMA years ago, IMC has presented more than 50 retail brands from global suppliers to enhance the selections you can offer your clients. We invite you to browse any of our 2,200+ products on the BRAND NEW IMC website to see items suitable for any occasion or event and pieces you can use to personalize your relationship with your clients. You can register as a distributor, track orders, upload art for virtual samples and even create your own flyers and catalogs of our products. We welcome you to 2017 and wish you the best and we hope you had time to stop and visit IMC at the PPAI Las Vegas show. The 2017 IMC catalog is available by request from the IMC website and is posted on the online services. We’ll continue to treat our clients professionally and get your orders to you…on time and on budget. You can also request our 2017 catalog using the catalog page of our website or download the PDF. We have products for every event and if your client has invented a holiday or celebration, we can also custom-make almost anything you can dream to make your client’s event all it can be. Take a look at our YouTube channel to see some videos showcasing popular products for some ideas on how to use them. We take our business relationship seriously and we want you to enjoy, give and receive our products and be able to use them every day. We look forward to working with you and we always have ideas to make our products work for your clients. The 2017 IMC catalog is also live and available virtually at Zoomcatalog.com and on our website if you’re tired of fighting paper catalogs and it can be viewed nicely with your laptop, iPad, tablet or phone. IMC is the recognized leader in the introduction of new retail brands to the promotional product industry and has multiple design awards from both ASI and PPAI. We have promotional products for every event, show, convention, corporate store and company program that will keep your client looking to you for new ideas. What do you say…what’s your recovery time?