Last week we spoke about the lying on both sides of the aisle as if were some big revelation and had just started in 2016 and didn’t go all the way back to the dawn of time when Eve said, “I just took a small bite.” I believe we’ve become so inured to all the lies because we tell so many fibs in our everyday life. Generally, except for all you crooks out there, they are harmless and often done to spare someone’s feelings. I myself told a woman the other day that her eye shadow made her eyes pop and I left off the second half of the sentence which was…like a frog being strangled. But I am almost too kind and often go out of my way with concern for my fellow man while the majority of you do not.
We’ve all become so effective at prevarication it now has almost become first nature instead of its rightful place as second nature and I blame you parents. You lie about Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny or the Purim Possum, the Yeti and the tooth fairy…sorry if I’m breaking big news to some of you but when you saw Santa and your Mom making out, it should have been a clue. And if you can figure out the correlation between the Easter Bunny and chicken eggs, you’re a better person than I because I’ve had 4-year olds come up to me with a chocolate bunny and a hard-boiled egg and say, “OK, this doesn’t look right.”
The biggest lies we tell our children is where pets go and I understand kids feel their pets are part of the family so I empathize with the pressure parents are under. So I propose we try the honest approach so the next time you lose a pet. Just gather the kids around you and tell them the truth. “Remember how we told you Grandma moved and didn’t want to see you anymore? Well, Fluffy felt the same way.” One of my kids won a goldfish at a carnival when they were about 2 and it died in the plastic bag even before we got home but when we got home, the rest of the family went into the house and I dropped “Goldie” into a drain on the street and took the empty bag of water into the house. When the kids asked where the fish was, I just told them it must have swum away. I have a friend whose son had a tortoise and my friend accidentally turned him into soup by running over him with the minivan so he told his kid that his pet, “Had run off to join the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles”…and the kid believed it for 7 years. And if you believe Sparky is happy on the farm your parents sent him to, you’re probably running around today looking for pots of gold. If all the dogs we’ve said have gone away to live on farms to keep old people company really did that, we’d be up to our eyeballs in dogs…and old people. If you believed your parents when they said Mittens was fine, she just ran away by jumping on the bumper of that speeding car, you probably need a medication refilled. I have another friend and she still believes her bunny never died…every couple of years it just changed color. I’ve known parents who told their children the fish escaped and dove in the toilet bowl and swam away to freedom. That’s why the saying, “If you love something, set it free” should be “If you love something, flush twice.”
IMC has in excess of 2200 promotional products that will help you serve your client and we are adding new brand partners and products from our collections and our established retail brand partners. We believe IMC products speak for themselves and we can also show you ways to use and market them to your clients. Our products with decoration will have your customer coming back time and time again. Since introducing Waterford® Writing Instruments and MoMA years ago, IMC has presented more than 50 retail brands from global suppliers to enhance the selections you can offer your clients. We invite you to browse any of our 2,200+ products on the BRAND NEW IMC website to see items suitable for any occasion or event and pieces you can use to personalize your relationship with your clients. You can register as a distributor, track orders, upload art for virtual samples and even create your own flyers and catalogs of our products. We welcome you to 2017 and wish you the best and we hope you had time to stop and visit IMC at the PPAI Las Vegas show. The 2017 IMC catalog is available by request from the IMC website and is posted on the online services. We’ll continue to treat our clients professionally and get your orders to you…on time and on budget. You can also request our 2017 catalog using the catalog page of our website or download the PDF. We have products for every event and if your client has invented a holiday or celebration, we can also custom-make almost anything you can dream to make your client’s event all it can be. Take a look at our YouTube channel to see some videos showcasing popular products for some ideas on how to use them. We take our business relationship seriously and we want you to enjoy, give and receive our products and be able to use them every day. We look forward to working with you and we always have ideas to make our products work for your clients. The 2017 IMC catalog is also live and available virtually at Zoomcatalog.com and on our website if you’re tired of fighting paper catalogs and it can be viewed nicely with your laptop, iPad, tablet or phone. IMC is the recognized leader in the introduction of new retail brands to the promotional product industry and has multiple design awards from both ASI and PPAI. We have promotional products for every event, show, convention, corporate store and company program that will keep your client looking to you for new ideas. What do you think? Let us know with a comment here or on Facebook or Twitter. IMC wants to know…have you seen mittens?