There’s been a lot of talk in the media about alternative facts as if we live in a parallel universe where blue means orange and John Gotti is a parish priest. If two people disagree about a fact, those are perceptions and while that may be your reality, it doesn’t make it real. The truth should be just the truth and while I don’t give a furry rat’s behind what side of the fence you’re on, we should all long for the day when the truth will just be the truth and not affected by some spin doctor, as if death by lethal injection is somehow more humane than being roasted on a spit. The problem is that we’ve left it to the media to cry foul and hold people accountable for what they say and do and we can’t always count on the media not to be corporate shills or would-be thespians. The media is not supposed to be entertainment and it’s not entertaining so stop trying to give us the news as if you’re auditioning for the Red Skelton School of Acting. So while I admit I used to have a greater respect for the 4th estate, it has waned over the years as they continue to pander to our baser instincts as if anyone with an IQ above a cabbage cares about Kim Kardashian’s what do I name my baby drama.
Owing to my keen mind and vast investigative skills I have deduced when news first turned the corner and was blinded by the bright lights of Hollywood…and I blame CNN, although every other outlet soon followed suit. It began slowly but now, after every tragedy, either weather or human-based, the news outlets actively engage in a contest to find the biggest idiot in the state to comment on it. Technically the 2nd biggest idiot because most states have already elected the biggest idiot to Congress. Think about it…every time a hurricane whips through the south, they end up talking to some guy with about three teeth who’s precariously perched on the top of his house with his chickens wondering how he’s going to get to his part-time job as a Waffle House busboy because he doesn’t know how to swim. When a tornado rips through a Nebraska trailer park it’s usually some old woman who lives in a cave by the river (for the view) because she saw a mobile home fly by. She hasn’t voted since Roosevelt died and she keeps comparing this morning’s wind with “the big one” in ’78, she thinks it’s still 2003 and the highlight of her interview is when she ends it with some homespun homily like, “and that’s the reason around here we call trailers…tornado bait.”
And for those journalists who work around Washington or any of the state capitals, I’m also getting a little tired of your professed outrage and offense when someone has the temerity to lie to you. In those arenas you’re asking questions of people who lie for a living so please spare us your phony incredulity and search for the truth with your supposed investigative skills. If you give us the truth there are enough smart people out here in America (you can usually tell who we are because we don’t have a gun in our car) to understand it. Believe me, out here in America there are millions of people smarter than you are so if you think it’s a lie, we’ll for damned sure know it’s a lie so call it that and worry less about whether the speaker meant it or not. That’s like telling someone you didn’t mean to pull the trigger.
A note to print journalists: Your only job is to tell us the truth and call people out when they lie. Stop writing as if it’s a Stephen King novella. If you could write a Stephen King novella, you’d be sitting in a cabin in Maine in front of a typewriter holding a mug of mulled wine. So investigate the story, tell us the truth and if you can’t do that, you’d better learn how to scramble eggs because I think Denny’s is hiring.
IMC has in excess of 2200 promotional products that will help you serve your client and we are adding new brand partners and products from our collections and our established retail brand partners. We believe IMC products speak for themselves and we can also show you ways to use and market them to your clients. Our products with decoration will have your customer coming back time and time again. Since introducing Waterford® Writing Instruments and MoMA years ago, IMC has presented more than 50 retail brands from global suppliers to enhance the selections you can offer your clients. We invite you to browse any of our 2,200+ products on the BRAND NEW IMC website to see items suitable for any occasion or event and pieces you can use to personalize your relationship with your clients. You can register as a distributor, track orders, upload art for virtual samples and even create your own flyers and catalogs of our products. The 2017 IMC catalog is available by request from the IMC website and is posted on the online services. We’ll continue to treat our clients professionally and get your orders to you…on time and on budget. You can also request our 2017 catalog using the catalog page of our website or download the PDF. We have products for every event and if your client has invented a holiday or celebration, we can also custom-make almost anything you can dream to make your client’s event all it can be. Take a look at our YouTube channel to see some videos showcasing popular products for some ideas on how to use them. We take our business relationship seriously and we want you to enjoy, give and receive our products and be able to use them every day. We look forward to working with you and we always have ideas to make our products work for your clients. The 2017 IMC catalog is also live and available virtually at Zoomcatalog.com and on our website if you’re tired of fighting paper catalogs and it can be viewed nicely with your laptop, iPad, tablet or phone. IMC is the recognized leader in the introduction of new retail brands to the promotional product industry and has multiple design awards from both ASI and PPAI. We have promotional products for every event, show, convention, corporate store and company program that will keep your client looking to you for new ideas. What do you think? Let us know with a comment here or on Facebook or Twitter. IMC wants to know…does that sound a little fishy?