I would like to wish you all the happiest of holidays but this whole holiday spirit thing is leaking out of me faster than a politician’s promise. This season of peace, happiness and good will toward all can’t seem to end soon enough for some of us because we just can’t get everybody on board with the theme. There are still people out there with ever-shortening fuses and people who mistakenly believe their time is more important than everyone else’s. The mall is a nightmare and while I must have missed the memo, it has also turned into a giant dog park. I tripped over a Shih Tzu in the men’s department at Macy’s the other day and my knee is still sore so I’m a little cranky. I thought someone had just dropped a cashmere sweater until it took out a piece of my leg. I’m a big supporter of service dogs and the support they give to truly disabled persons but if you need a support dog to buy boxer briefs at Macy’s, you need to ask your doctor about thorazine. And later that day I was walking around Sephora behind a Corgi that I can only assume was looking for a new shade of eye shadow. That’s another difference between service and support dogs. A real service dog wouldn’t let you buy that color but your emotional support dog would lie and say, “No, you look good in that.”
I’m a big pet lover and always have at least two dogs and cats and have had guinea pigs, rabbits and rats as the kids were growing up. Hell, if I could get a turtle to bring in the paper from the driveway in less than three days, I’d probably have one of those. That said I know where pets do, and don’t, belong. I’m fine and approve in the increase of restaurants with outdoor patios welcoming dogs because my dogs and I like to dine al fresco and I’m encouraged about us as a people when I see dog parks in every city. I’m also OK with the fact that the outdoor patio at my Starbucks looks like an obedience class at PetSmart but just leave them in the car when you go into Safeway. If you’re so inept and troubled that you think you need your Yorkie to help you pick out the perfect cantaloupe, you’re probably on the waiting list for a frontal lobotomy. They don’t even have a thumb to thump it. And I don’t want to be perusing the cheese section for a nice appetizer while the Rottweiler next to me drools all over the Camembert. I’m just trying to get a prescription refilled so I don’t need to look down and find your incontinent cocker peeing on my shoe. I understand the need for a service dog to lead its owner to the Stouffers Mac ‘n Cheese but if you are carrying your support dog in your handbag…who’s providing the support? If you’re walking your support dachshund around in a stroller…who’s getting the support?
All of you entitled whiners lugging your emotional support dogs around in your purses are breaking the law and it’s your actions that make me rethink my position on the death penalty. Here’s the deal…service dogs can go anywhere their person goes but support dogs are pets and can only go where pets are allowed so stop whining if you’re not allowed to have your poodle on your lap while the dentist finishes that root canal. And unless you’ve taught your support dog to enter your Pin number while you bag your groceries, I don’t want to see them in the express lane ahead of me. And if they can’t order eggs benedict in English and use a napkin, I don’t expect them to join me for brunch.
Happy Holidays to you and yours and all the best in 2017 from the
IMC has in excess of 2200 promotional products that will help you serve your client and we are adding new brand partners and products from our collections and our established retail brand partners. We believe IMC products speak for themselves and we can also show you ways to use and market them to your clients. Our products with decoration will have your customer coming back time and time again. Since introducing Waterford® Writing Instruments and MoMA years ago, IMC has presented more than 48 retail brands from global suppliers to enhance the selections you can offer your clients. We invite you to browse any of our 2,300+ products on the BRAND NEW IMC website to see items suitable for any occasion or event and pieces you can use to personalize your relationship with your clients. You can register as a distributor, track orders, upload art for virtual samples and even create your own flyers and catalogs of our products. As 2016 winds down, we wish you the best of the holiday season and for 2017, and we invite you to visit IMC at the PPAI Las Vegas show where we will occupy Booth 3751. The 2017 IMC catalog is available by request from the IMC website and will be posted on the online services as soon as it is available. We’ll continue to treat our clients professionally and get your orders to you…on time and on budget. You can also get on the distribution list for our 2017 catalog using the catalog page of our website. We have products for every event and if your client has invented a holiday or celebration, we can also custom-make almost anything you can dream to make your client’s event all it can be. Take a look at our YouTube channel to see some videos showcasing popular products for some ideas on how to use them. We take our business relationship seriously and we want you to enjoy, give and receive our products and be able to use them every day. We look forward to working with you and we always have ideas to make our products work for your clients. The 2016 IMC catalog is also live and available virtually at Zoomcatalog.com if you’re tired of fighting paper catalogs and the 2017 catalog will be live in January. It can be viewed nicely with your laptop, iPad, tablet or phone. IMC is the recognized leader in the introduction of new retail brands to the promotional product industry and has multiple design awards from both ASI and PPAI. We have promotional products for every event, show, convention, corporate store and company program that will keep your client looking to you for new ideas. What do you think? Let us know with a comment here or on Facebook or Twitter. IMC wants to know…are you pet-friendly or just crazy?