I mentioned a couple of weeks ago how disappointed I am with the brand of thief America is raising and how I was tired of people stealing my credit card numbers and using them to stock up on beef jerky and Coors Light at the 7/11. Take some pride in your thievery…maybe instead of dashing into the Quickstop for Cheetos and a carton of cigarettes you could sit down and have lunch at the Cheesecake Factory. Try their mud pie, I hear it’s delicious. It’s not like it’s your money!
Anyway, I realized I neglected to take to task the credit card companies and their fraud protection sleuths that call me to inquire about questionable charges. I’m all for tightening the reins on credit card fraud but the phrase “fraud protection” is basically a misnomer and the people who man the phones are the people who have failed to sell me an extended auto warranty by phone for a car I sold three years ago. So now they’re manning the phones in the “fraud” department for one of the megalithic banking institutions that gave us the chip technology that seems about as useful as locking your bike with a twist tie.
My first issue with the “fraud” department is that they spend more time trying to get me to prove I’m me than they do with the fraudulent charges. I’m giving my last four of social, my billing zip code, the maiden name of my grandmother’s aunt in Wales and I’m waiting for them to make me run down to the police station to have my cheek swabbed for DNA. Only after I’ve proven I’m the good guy in this equation will they discuss the charges. Secondly, they really need to examine their policies because they’re calling me to verify a $4 charge for milk a block from my house, while a $1300 charge at a reindeer ranch in Finland sails right through without raising a red flag? I can’t even find my passport and somehow Citi thinks I’m off buying new livestock. What…for my sleigh? They’ll call me if my wife uses her card at her office in Utah because apparently they know we’re not Morman so why would we be in Utah but somebody in Florida can spend $300 at a marijuana clinic in Tampa and they don’t bat an eye.
What I really want is a credit card with a credit limit of about $3. I would leave that out everywhere in the hopes it would be stolen. Then when the thief tried to use it to buy a root beer and a bag of chips, it would be declined and he’d look like a fool.
Over the years things have improved though with ATMs wanting your blood type, chip technology, which is at least impervious to anyone without a cell phone, fraud protection that forces you to remember the name of your first pet and thumbprints that look like a Rorschach drawing so maybe we’re moving forward. About 35 years ago before ATMs we had a checkbook stolen and someone walked into our bank, whose name I won’t mention but their initials are B of A and they cashed a check written in crayon and signed by someone who couldn’t even spell my name but apparently the bank teller had been sick on “fraud prevention training day.”
By the way, if anyone is considering identity theft I’d encourage you to take mine because being me is getting old.
It’s not really that different in business. IMC has a lineup in excess of 2000 promotional products that will help you serve your client and we are adding more for 2017 with new brand partners and products from our collections and our established retail brand partners. We believe IMC products speak for themselves and we can also show you ways to use and market them to your clients. Our products with decoration will have your customer coming back time and time again. The 2016 IMC catalog is available by request from the IMC website and is posted on the online services while we work on the 2017 catalog. We’ll continue to treat our clients professionally and get your orders to you…on time and on budget. You can also get on the distribution list for our 2017 catalog using the catalog page of our website. In addition, IMC just introduced 97 new items at the SAAC show in California and they are live in the section of our website. You may also go to our Tools section of the website and download the 2016.5 flyer. We have products for every event and if your client has invented a holiday or celebration, we can also custom-make almost anything you can dream to make your client’s event all it can be. Take a look at our YouTube channel to see some videos showcasing popular products for some ideas on how to use them. We take our business relationship seriously and we want you to enjoy, give and receive our products and be able to use them every day. We look forward to working with you and we always have ideas to make our products work for your clients. The 2016 IMC catalog is also live and available virtually at Zoomcatalog.com if you’re tired of fighting paper catalogs. It can be viewed nicely with your laptop, iPad, tablet or phone. IMC is the recognized leader in the introduction of new retail brands to the promotional product industry and has multiple design awards from both ASI and PPAI. Since introducing Waterford® Writing Instruments and MoMA years ago, IMC has presented more than 48 retail brands from global suppliers to enhance the selections you can offer your clients. We invite you to browse any of our 2,300+ products on the IMC website to see items suitable for any occasion or event and pieces you can use to personalize your relationship with your clients. We have promotional products for every event, show, convention, corporate store and company program that will keep your client looking to you for new ideas. What do you think? Let us know with a comment here or on Facebook or Twitter. IMC wants to know…are you you?