If I Vote, Do I Get Syrup?

Donn James

Donn James

As strongly as I’ve tried to avoid the presidential campaign I find my fingers can no longer stay silent. I can barely even watch the debates so I read the recaps and results because the debates are the worst acting on TV. It’s like comparing Meryl Streep to Scooby Doo. So, I also rarely get political as I was taught many moons ago that you do not discuss politics or religion with people because everyone else is usually wrong but after the New Hampshire caucus, I can no longer still my digits. In an era where appearance is everything and the media has done its best to turn the campaign into a reality show, I believe we should have better looking people running for president. If TV has taught us anything it’s that you can’t look like the cast of HeeHaw unless you’re funny and all doctors and lawyers are beautiful, so they should be able to come up with funnier or better looking politicians so I’m not throwing up a little in my mouth watching the debates.
The masses in New Hampshire proved that we have left the deep waters and become increasingly shallow so I’m going to take them at face value…which is not a pretty picture. Maybe their brains are addled by the continued influx of maple syrup but I don’t know how can a man named Vermin Supreme only get 260 votes? He wears a boot on his head and promises free ponies for everyone if he is elected. How can you not want a pony? How can you not want a candidate who looks like Albus Dumbledore…if he was homeless and soaking wet and yet, still be the most attractive candidate on that side of the slate? Send that guy to California, we’ll get him some delegates. It’s like all the good looking democrats were cut during the first round of American Idol and they were left with two choices; a lady who looks like she should be teaching remedial math in a schoolhouse in 1865 Wichita or a guy who looks remarkably like the guy in the orange vest collecting the shopping carts in front of the Simi Valley Walmart.
On the republican side, I’ve seen a better looking crowd waiting to catch the Greyhound bus to Bakersfield. After Iowa and New Hampshire they’re starting to drop like dandruff onto your shoulders but there are still enough of them to fill a carton of eggs; just not as good looking. Seeing them all on stage reminded me of the starting lineup for the new season of Survivor. Maybe that’s how they should have decided New Hampshire. Whoever eats the most bugs wins. The vice presidency goes to the guy who made a loincloth out of seaweed. And the Grand Old Party lost Chris Christie, Carly Fiorina and Rand Paul for very different reasons this week. Christie just wasn’t getting enough to eat at the buffets and Rand realized people weren’t going to vote for somebody who didn’t realize that some names just can’t be shortened. Randal to Rand? That’s like changing Fred to Fr. Fiorina’s reasoning was much more introspective. She’s very bright and thought, “If 95.9% of the people in New Hampshire think I’m a dork…then I’m probably a dork.” TV’s problem is, they were the best looking of the bunch. Now we’re left with Trump who looks like he’s trying to impersonate a bobblehead of…Donald Trump; Cruz, who looks like a grown-up Pinocchio or the kid the Duggar’s gave away to keep it at 19 and Counting and Rubio, who looks like he’s slick enough to be selling burial plots in a pet cemetery. The GOP also has Ben Carson, a retired brain surgeon who, when asked by the media if he was qualified to be President of the United States replied, “Hey, it’s not brain surgery.”

It’s not really that different in business. IMC should get your vote to supply and decorate your promotional products and, for 2016, we have new products from our collections and 6 new retail brands for the industry. We believe IMC products speak for themselves and we can also show you ways to use and market them to your clients. The 2016 IMC catalog is available by request from the IMC website and will be posted on the online services. We’ll continue to treat our clients professionally and get your orders to you…on time and on budget. If you’re curious about What's New?click on the tab and see. You can also get on the distribution list for our 2016 catalog using the catalog page of our website. We have new items in the IMC Collections and several new retail brands debuting in 2016. We have products for every event and if your client has invented a holiday or celebration, we can also custom-make almost anything you can dream to make your client’s event all it can be. Take a look at our YouTube channel to see some videos showcasing popular products for some ideas on how to use them. We take our business relationship seriously and we want you to enjoy, give and receive our products and be able to use them every day. We look forward to working with you and we always have ideas to make our products work for your clients. The 2016 IMC catalog is also live and available virtually at Zoomcatalog.com if you’re tired of fighting paper catalogs. It can be viewed nicely with your laptop, iPad, tablet or phone. IMC is the recognized leader in the introduction of new retail brands to the promotional product industry and has multiple design awards from both ASI and PPAI. Since introducing Waterford® Writing Instruments and MoMA years ago, IMC has presented more than 48 retail brands from global suppliers to enhance the selections you can offer your clients. This year we are proud to present Just Mobile, Block, Magisso, PlayableART, Molla Space and Airplane Pockets to the promotional products industry. We invite you to browse any of our 2,300+ products on the IMC website to see items suitable for any occasion or event and pieces you can use to personalize your relationship with your clients. We have promotional products for every event, show, convention, corporate store and company program that will keep your client looking to you for new ideas. What do you think? Let us know with a comment here or on Facebook or TwitterIMC wants to know…do you need an absentee ballot?

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About IMC

IMC is a prime manufacturer and supplier of products to the promotional products industry. We sell only to qualified promotional products distributors. ASI supplier, PPAI supplier. Our lines include our own IMC lines and 26 branded lines.
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