I have had an iPad almost since their inception and I am now used to carrying around my life on what is essentially a small electric griddle. I have everything in it and the only downside is that now I just can’t read anything that’s not virtual anymore. I may have told you I stared at an unopened book on my coffee table for two months before I realized I could go online and buy it for $2.99. See, the physical act of turning a page is just too exhausting. You have to reach up all the way to the top corner of the page…it’s just too much work. Plus, you have to lick your finger once in a while so now you’re involving even more muscle groups and if it’s late in the day, there’s no way of telling how many food groups are growing bacteria on that finger because I think I just tasted bacon.
What brought this all up is we have a local weekly newspaper in our area and I have to read it in print because I like to stay current on the events in my and the surrounding communities…just in case something happened on the 8th grade field trip to Washington DC that wasn’t already posted on Facebook. I only have to turn one page (thankfully) to get to the Letters to the Editor which is always people complaining about kids, conveniently forgetting they were once kids, and not remembering how bad their own kids were. The other hot topic in Suburbia is car people complaining about cyclists or cyclists complaining about car people. Car people are always emboldened by the 4,000 pounds of metal protecting them from the 8 pound bike while the bike people just want to share the road as they blow through every red light while the car people are stopped.
As difficult as it is, I manage to turn two more pages just to get to my favorite section of the paper…the Police Blotter. It’s the best section in the whole paper because since we’re in a relatively low-crime area, what the paper thinks is criminal can also be comical. You know, things like real estate signs being stolen and placed outside port-o-johns at construction sites, garden gnomes placed in compromising positions, people watering their yards on the wrong day…petty crimes that aren’t going to get you the best seat in the cafeteria at Alcatraz. But this week we have an honest to goodness crime wave because in 3 different surrounding communities serviced by the paper, a total of 6 third-row seats have been stolen out of minivans. We need to call the FBI because this is a conundrum on too many levels for me to comprehend. The FBI certainly can’t solve it but maybe they know somebody smart. Laurie drives a minivan and now every morning I find myself squinting through the tinted glass to make sure we still have what we refer to as the dogs’ seat. What are thieves doing with third-row seating? Are they just taking them to the valley and trying to sell different ones to people they stole a different one from? Maybe someone is building a white trash media room. Am I going to go to a seedy bar sometime down the road and find all these seats set up in rows with alcoholics sitting on them watching bad Nicholas Sparks’ movies played on a white bed sheet taped to the wall? Maybe somebody is building their own DMV and needs to furnish the waiting room.
Some days I can make it all the way to the back pages of the paper where they have the Pet section but it’s depressing because it’s mostly about missing pets. People need to know…they’re not missing…they’re gone. We live in an area where we occasionally see a mountain lion or black bear and regularly see coyotes and owls the size of a Cessna; yesterday a raccoon was getting on the freeway at the same time as I was. The point is…nobody is stealing pets; pets are now on the menu. The screech you heard last night was Fluffy saying goodbye.
It’s not really that different in business. We don’t offer much in the way of seating but IMC hopes you’re enjoying our new retail brands and products for the industry. New brands like Alessi, Areaware and our new designer sunglasses collection from Bobby Jones, Carmen Marc Valvo and Michael Stars are live on our website. And we’ll continue to treat our customers professionally and get your orders to you…on time and on budget. If you’re curious about click on the tab and see. We also have our 2015 catalog ready to ship and you can move through the IMC catalog from category to category and find many products that will accent your client’s event and we’ll get you what you want even if we have some suggestions on how to make it more rewarding. Go to the Catalog page of the IMC website and put your order in and we’ll get them to you. Let us know if you’d like samples. We want to help you make sense of your client’s request so we offer choices between new products and classic items so they can make presentations memorable. And IMC cares that your order is correct so we keep lots of products around that are suitable for your events but we’ll let you decide what works best for you and jump in to help you with decisions about products and decorations. And if your client has invented a holiday or celebration, we can also custom-make almost anything you can dream to make your client’s event all it can be. Take a look at our YouTube channel to see some videos showcasing popular products for some ideas on how to use them. We take our business relationship seriously and we want you to enjoy, give and receive our products and be able to use them every day. We look forward to working with you and we always have ideas to make our products work for your clients. The 2015 IMC catalog is live and available virtually at Zoomcatalog.com if you’re tired of fighting paper catalogs. It can be viewed nicely with your laptop, iPad, tablet or phone. IMC is the recognized leader in the introduction of new retail brands to the promotional product industry and has multiple design awards from both ASI and PPAI. Since introducing Waterford® Writing Instruments and MoMA years ago, IMC has presented more than 48 retail brands from global suppliers to enhance the selections you can offer your clients. See great ideas and items from Troika, Visconti, Trendex and Clearaward. We invite you to browse any of our 2,300+ products on the IMC website to see items suitable for any occasion or event and pieces you can use to personalize your relationship with your clients. We have promotional products for every event, show, convention, corporate store and company program that will keep your client looking to you for new ideas. What do you think? Let us know with a comment here or on Facebook or Twitter. IMC wants to know…are you missing something?