I missed you all last week because I went to Minnesota for a Valentine’s Day party. I went voluntarily because I was curious to see just how far I would go for a party. The new bar is set at 2,000 miles, but before I revel in any false sense of pride, I’m guessing the line between party animal and idiot has blurred. I prefer to think of myself as an incurable romantic because Minnesota in February is nobody’s idea of heaven. Try as I might not to, when you live in a land without weather as we do, sometimes you just forget other parts of the country have weather.
Minnesota is just too cold. It’s like the Arctic except they have a Walmart. When I left the office Thursday my car said the temperature was 88° and when we landed in Minneapolis Friday afternoon the temperature was 4°. And that was the high for the next two days. Here’s the deal…four is not a temperature…four is the place you came in at the County Fair watermelon eating contest. If you’re average, four is the number of fingers on one hand and if I know you, four may be your IQ but four is not a temperature. Within a few minutes of arrival the temperature had dropped to zero which I took to mean it had disappeared. I thought, “Great, even the weather knows it is too cold to be here.” Who knew temperature also came in minus numbers? In my math, zero is the absence of weather and I think the thermometer just said, “This is ridiculous” and gave up. I swear that if I lived here more than 48 hours I’d be hiding in my bed pouring tequila on my Cheerios. I was not meant to live like that; if I was, my butt would still be covered with fur. You can’t tell me this is normal when I have icicles forming on my nose hair and my breath smells like penguin.
In Minnesota people buy bigger houses than they need because they have to spend all their time in it. They’re like bears and their house is their cave because, like bears, you have to hibernate all winter because it’s too cold to go outside. My friends have a big yard and they have wild turkeys and deer wandering around and even they were looking for a way in. The turkeys were screaming, “We’ll be dinner…just let us in.” Everybody has a basement because it’s warmer than the rest of the house because it’s underground. I just tend to think of it as a giant coffin. They also have rooms called “mud rooms” and that’s a room you enter from outside and you kick off your shoes and several layers of clothing…at least enough so you can move your arms and legs again. It’s kind of like unwrapping a mummy. As your clothes thaw out, it turns the floor into a giant puddle. Just north of where I was there’s a town where it was just -41° and the name of the town is Embarrass. I think they named the town because that’s how the people feel who live there.
On the way home Sunday we were a little delayed because they had to de-ice the plane. See…even the damn plane knew it was freezing.
It’s not really that different in business. IMC has welcomed the New Year with new brands and products for the industry. New brands like Alessi, Areaware and our new designer sunglass collection from Bobby Jones, Carmen Marc Valvo and Michael Stars are live on our website now. We’ll continue to treat our customers professionally and get your orders to you…on time and on budget. If you’re curious about click on the tab and see. We also have our 2015 catalog ready to ship and you can move through the IMC catalog from category to category and find many products that will accent your client’s event and we’ll get you what you want even if we have some suggestions on how to make it more rewarding. Go to the Catalog page of the IMC website and put your order in and we’ll get them to you and let us know if you’d like samples. We want to help you make sense of your client’s request so we offer choices between new products and classic items so they can make presentations memorable. And IMC cares that your order is correct so we keep lots of products around that are suitable for your events but we’ll let you decide what works best for you and jump in to help you with decisions about products and decorations. And if your client has invented a holiday or celebration, we can also custom-make almost anything you can dream to make your client’s event all it can be. Take a look at our YouTube channel to see some videos showcasing popular products for some ideas on how to use them. We take our business relationship seriously and we want you to enjoy, give and receive our products and be able to use them every day. We look forward to working with you and we always have ideas to make our products work for your clients. The 2015 IMC catalog is live and available virtually at Zoomcatalog.com if you’re tired of fighting paper catalogs. It can be viewed nicely with your laptop, iPad, tablet or phone. IMC is the recognized leader in the introduction of new retail brands to the promotional product industry and has multiple design awards from both ASI and PPAI. Since introducing Waterford® Writing Instruments and MoMA years ago, IMC has presented more than 48 retail brands from global suppliers to enhance the selections you can offer your clients. See great ideas and items from Kikkerland, MOVA, Visconti and Goodfaire. We invite you to browse any of our 2,300+ products on the IMC website to see items suitable for any occasion or event and pieces you can use to personalize your relationship with your clients. We have promotional products for every event, show, convention, corporate store and company program that will keep your client looking to you for new ideas. What do you think? Let us know with a comment here or on Facebook or Twitter. IMC wants to know…how’s the weather up there?