The other day I had the great fortune to witness three people unsuccessfully try to assemble a cardboard banker’s box in our offices and the time it took was so extensive, I kept waiting for Moe to poke Curly in the eyes. I guess three is the answer to the old joke, “How many people does it take to assemble a banker’s box?” All informed people know a banker’s box comes with the directions written and in pictures on the bottom of the box. Note the photo. Now, I try and surround myself with people of some intelligence and am usually successful although this episode made me rethink our hiring practices. This threesome was looking at the box like it was the portal to an alternate universe. Or cave people standing around trying to figure out fire. I don’t expect my friends and co-workers to cure Ebola or even figure out how they put the chocolate inside the candy shell at the M&M factory, but I do expect them to know how a grape turns into a raisin.
We’re talking about a banker’s box here folks. It’s not like they were trying to solve a Rubik’s Cube while standing on a block of ice with a rope around their necks. And they’re not deconstructing a DNA strand from a rabid badger. I should probably again note that the directions are printed on the bottom of the box and if that is not enough…there is a picture showing every step that is so simple to follow that if you can’t follow it…you shouldn’t be allowed to use scissors or sharp knives. And it’s not like we buy them at Ikea and the directions are in Swedish; it’s good old American English, yet the three of them were standing there with puzzled looks on their faces most resembling a family of penguins trying to figure out how to peel an orange.
Since step-by-step directions proved too daunting for this trio, I again note that every side of the box is labeled for easy assembly and the cardboard is perforated perfectly to form it into a box. It even says “Separate at perforation” right where it is well…perforated. They’ve even made is easier these days because they have attached the lid to the frame so you don’t lose it, but this turned into a quantification they were unable to surmount because they skipped Step I which is to…TAKE THE LID OFF THE BOX. They kept trying to fold the lid and make it part of the box. Apparently they thought the perforation was just a suggestion. All I could think was that my dog could have repaired my vacuum by now. Hell, Alexander Graham Bell could have invented the cell phone by now.
I believe I may have mentioned the directions are written on the box but you may notice in the attached photo the numbered directions are written using Roman numerals and I expect that is what threw them off (another scathing indictment of our educational system) and that will be their excuse when we play the video of this at the holiday party next month. Now, you’re probably asking, could I have jumped in and put it together in 8-10 seconds? Sure…but where would be the fun in that? I would publicly like to thank the trio for the comic relief so rarely found in an office atmosphere because they took the simple act of assembling a box and turned it into what looked like a group of 3-year olds trying to tie their shoes.
It’s not really that different in business. We won’t put your order in a box. IMC will put your order together professionally and get it to you on time and on budget. You can move through our catalog from category to category and find many products that will accent your client’s event and we’ll get you what you want even if we have some suggestions on how to make it more rewarding. We’ll even send you samples. We want to help you make sense of your client’s request so we offer choices between new products and classic items so they can make presentations memorable. And IMC cares that your order is correct so we keep lots of products around that are suitable for your events but we’ll let you decide what works best for you and jump in to help you with decisions about products and decorations. We are hard at work on the 2015 catalog which will have tons of new items from our collections and existing brands and some brand new retail brands. And if your client has invented a holiday or celebration, we can also custom-make almost anything you can dream to make your client’s event all it can be. Take a look at our YouTube channel to see some videos showcasing popular products for some ideas on how to use them. We take our business relationship seriously and we want you to enjoy, give and receive our products and be able to use them every day. We look forward to working with you and we always have ideas to make our products work for your clients. And all of our new items are visible in the
section of our website. The 2014 IMC catalog is also available virtually at Zoomcatalog.com if you’re tired of fighting paper catalogs. It can be viewed nicely with your laptop, iPad, tablet or phone. IMC is the recognized leader in the introduction of new retail brands to the promotional product industry and has multiple design awards from both ASI and PPAI. Since introducing Waterford® Writing Instruments and MoMA years ago, IMC has presented more than 40 retail brands from global suppliers to enhance the selections you can offer your clients. See great ideas and items from Fred & Friends, Cerruti, Stewart/Stand and Orangebag. We invite you to browse any of our 2,500+ products on the IMC website to see items suitable for any occasion or event and pieces you can use to personalize your relationship with your clients. We have promotional products for every event, show, convention, corporate store and company program that will keep your client looking to you for new ideas. What do you think? Let us know with a comment here or on Facebook or Twitter. IMC wants to know…have you put it together?