I’ve mentioned before how much I dislike the people in Costco who stop at every free food stand and leave their cart in the aisle because that little bite of jalapeno, cranberry pasteurized fake cheese product is more important than simple courtesy to your fellow warehouse shoppers. While I hate those food stations, I feel it is necessary to expound on my earlier rants because I saw something even more disturbing this week. There was a gentleman and I say gentleman because he was clearly wearing his good sweat pants and his T-shirt only had three holes in addition to the one for his head and two for his arms. He was also wearing flip-flops as there was no way he was reaching down to tie anything. In fact, I can only guess the year he last saw his feet but I’m thinking…Reagan era. I don’t know how he got there but I’m guessing the WalMart people dropped him off after they threw him out. Anyway, he was riding around in a Costco motorized cart that was probably needed due to the fact that he was shaped like a bean bag chair with arms. It was like the Pillsbury Doughboy was melting. There was skin everywhere. Suffice to say, he’d clearly missed about his last seven or eight thousand Weight Watcher meetings and Jenny Craig wasn’t making him their spokesperson. This guy was not even pretending to shop. He’s driving the cart like he’s in a Demolition Derby but he’s just going from food station to food station for the free lunch like it was some sort of warehouse buffet. He’s bumping carts out of the way because he wants to top off that bite of sausage with some yogurt. He’s eating like he’s on the Atkin’s Diet in Dante’s Inferno. He would be at the top of the list if you were looking to describe the term…cheap date. It was like Costco had become his personal soup kitchen. I got the feeling he was a regular because he would stop at all the places giving coffee samples and he had a personalized mug.
No offense intended but most of you reading this, me included, are probably carrying a few more pounds than we need to survive the winter unless we plan on hibernating, but here’s a tip…STOP EATING AT COSTCO. It’s not a damned restaurant and if it was a restaurant you wouldn’t want your waiter or waitress to look like anybody serving you food at Costco. Have you looked at any of these people? They either look like your sick grandmother or they look like they just made parole. They only difference is the grandmas have a hairnet for their heads and the parolees have a hairnet to cover their beards.
Another issue with the food stands is they are the Costco version of “bait and switch” because they try and get you hooked to buy the product but when you go and find it on the shelf; you realize you’ll have enough to feed Fresno. Some little old lady just gave you a bite of something the size of a postage stamp but they only sell a package the size of Idaho. Then the guy, who just got out after doing time for manslaughter, is touting the new gluten-free, salt-free, taste-free pita chip and you think that might be nice to munch on in the living room in front of the TV but when you see the size of the bag you have to buy, you realize it won’t fit in your living room.
I also hate the guy in the paper hat with the cordless mic who thinks he’s in the food court at the County Fair hawking a blender. He’s giving away samples of chocolate that comes from pampered cows…you know, cows with manicures, college degrees, doting parents and telling everyone why this is “good” chocolate and everything else is “bad” chocolate when everyone with a brain in their head knows there is no such thing as “bad” chocolate.
It’s not really that different in business. You can move through our catalog from category to category and find many products that will accent your client’s event and we’ll get you what you want even if we have some suggestions on how to make it more rewarding. We’ll even send you samples and personalize almost everything. We want to help you make sense of your client’s request so we offer choices between new products and classic items so they can make presentations memorable. And IMC cares that your order is correct so we keep lots of products around that are suitable for your events but we’ll let you decide what works best for you and jump in to help you with decisions about products and decorations. We have processes in place to assemble your order and deliver it with no surprises. We are hard at work on the 2015 catalog which will have tons of new items from our collections and existing brands and some brand new retail brands. And if your client has invented a holiday or celebration, we can also custom-make almost anything you can dream to make your client’s event all it can be. Take a look at our YouTube channel to see some videos showcasing popular products for some ideas on how to use them. We take our business relationship seriously and we want you to enjoy, give and receive our products and be able to use them every day. We look forward to working with you and we always have ideas to make our products work for your clients. And all of our new items are visible in the section of our website. The 2014 IMC catalog is also available virtually at Zoomcatalog.com if you’re tired of fighting paper catalogs. It can be viewed nicely with your laptop, iPad, tablet or phone. IMC is the recognized leader in the introduction of new retail brands to the promotional product industry and has multiple design awards from both ASI and PPAI. Since introducing Waterford® Writing Instruments and MoMA years ago, IMC has presented more than 40 retail brands from global suppliers to enhance the selections you can offer your clients. See great ideas and items from Troika, Wedgwood, Ten Design and Clearaward. We invite you to browse any of our 2,500+ products on the IMC website to see items suitable for any occasion or event and pieces you can use to personalize your relationship with your clients. We have promotional products for every event, show, convention, corporate store and company program that will keep your client looking to you for new ideas. What do you think? Let us know with a comment here or on Facebook or Twitter. IMC wants to know…do you need a free lunch?