I’m not a big fan of boycotts because I’ve found that most of the people organizing boycotts are bigger morons than their targets. See, if you’re boycotting Cheerios because they showed an interracial couple in a commercial, you’re probably not evolved enough to eat Cheerios anyway. The only things I boycott these days are reality shows and all the fruit peelers, omelet makers and wax removers brazen enough to advertise on these shows. I just don’t need to see some cracker drop dynamite into a swamp in Louisiana to “catch” their dinner. While I advocate incarceration for anyone producing any of these fake reality shows, I realize we live in a free country which includes pulling the wool over the eyes of unsuspecting consumers but I just don’t get it. Are we really watching reality shows just to feel better about ourselves or is Honey Boo-Boo the poor woman’s Cosmopolitan? If you’re watching that show to pick up fashion tips, it’s time you considered a lobotomy. If you’re watching it to feel better about yourself, you might consider brushing your teeth and getting a job. If you learned how to act in a night club by watching the Jersey Shore, reality shows are the least of your problems. And how can we even hope to foster self-esteem in young women when we bombard them with shows like Teen Mom and all those real housewives? Those real housewives…guess what? They’re not real. Real people do not throw a fit because the valet can’t park your Bentley in the front row. And when you have fat professionally siphoned out of your butt and willingly inserted into your lips and forehead, reality is now in your rear view mirror…and fading fast. You need someone real? Look at your mother. She got you from here to there to everywhere, complaining about the traffic instead of her manicure. She packed all those lunches without worrying about how much to tip the masseuse at the Four Seasons. And if she’s sore, it’s because she did eight loads of laundry today, not because her personal trainer made her do one too many squats. She’s real, they aren’t.
And stop trying to tell me they’re educational. There’s a reality show called Naked and Afraid that drops a naked man and woman somewhere in the Congo and hopes they survive for 9-10 days. I am, of course, hoping they don’t but what could you possibly learn from that experience when you have your hands full trying to find a parking space at Costco? How is knowing they learned to weave a loincloth out of coconut going to change your day? I can learn more watching a rerun of Leave It to Beaver. At least he taught me how to get a bicycle out of a tree. I have friends who try and tell me the shows are interesting. When did the Amish become interesting? The only thing interesting about them is they don’t use electricity so they can’t watch reality shows. These are a people who think a zipper is a tool of the devil so why would I watch a show about their misadventures in the Big Apple? At this point I’m only interested in a catastrophe. I’m kind of hoping the kid goes into a strip club and has a seizure. Even the cooking shows have gotten into the act. These almost merit a pass because they might have some useful information but instead of focusing on the cooking, they always concentrate on the contestants’ back stories and I hate back stories. I realize I might be a little jaded but I want to learn to make Beef Wellington; I don’t care that you learned to make it while living with your Schnauzer in a Maytag box under an overpass on the I-405.
So, if you find yourself fully invested in whom the Bachelor or Bachelorette will pick, then cheat on and leave, or who is the best singer, dancer, model, crab fisherman or dog trainer, it’s time you started looking for a hobby. And why do we need more models anyway? They’re not real either. This reality epidemic has exploded exponentially because of the thousand channels we now have on TV but the biggest problem I have with all these choices is it now takes me all day to find out…there’s nothing on.
It’s not really that different in business. IMC always has something going on and we’re ready to help your clients celebrate milestones, anniversaries, shows or launches with thousands of products that will keep the celebration foremost in their minds. From crystal awards and designer pens for anniversaries, retirements, speaker or holiday gifting to pens and keychains for product launches, giveaways and thank-you gifts. Products you’d be happy to show on TV. And we know your clients test you with price, delivery and detailed logos so we know what we can do with our products and how you can use or market them. If you feel tied to a supplier, give IMC a call because we know our products are here to support your client’s event and we’ll be honest about what we can do in terms of pricing, decoration and shipping so you can make your customer happy. IMC has products to make you look and feel good and we continuously bring new brands and decorating options to the promotional product industry. These brands and options are developed with an eye toward the latest trends so we can continue to offer a wide realm of choices and options in both traditional and unusual promotional product categories. We are always happy to offer ideas, suggestions and case histories to help you present the items to your client. IMC is a recognized leader in the introduction of new retail brands to the promotional product industry and has multiple design awards from both ASI and PPAI. Our in-house family of decorators will turn your selection into a winner that will enhance your end-user’s event or ceremony. And IMC will take your order, deliver it on time, and on budget. We treat every order with a practiced professionalism so the things that happen will be what you expect from an award-winning supplier. As well as continuously expanding the available product in our 6 Collections, IMC continues our industry-leading practice of bringing new retail brands to the promotional products industry. Since introducing Waterford® Writing Instruments and MoMA years ago, IMC has presented more than 30 retail brands from global suppliers to enhance the selections you can offer your clients. These include world renowned designers like Troika and the unique offerings from Charles Jourdan and Goodfaire. And take a look at our newest retail brand Filter2Go because it’s great for summer promotions. And look for our 2013 Holiday Flyer in August so you can plan your seasonal promotions. We invite you to browse any of our 2,450+ products on the NEW IMC website to see items suitable for any occasion or event and pieces you can use to personalize your relationship with your clients. We have promotional products for every event, show, convention, corporate store and company program that will keep your client looking to you for new ideas. What do you think? Let us know with a comment here or on Facebook or Twitter. IMC wants to know…is any of this real?