Well, I’m back today after a rousing day of jury duty and while I’m used to people around here not missing me, the lack of applause upon my return was somewhat disheartening. After all, I did my civic duty, listened to the judge, had faith in the system and, in my own way, kept America safe. It may come as a shock to many but I am rarely chosen and when chosen, I am usually quickly excused. I choose to believe it is because I am too smart but others have opined that it may have something to do with the fact that I tend to doze off when the DA starts talking. But I have always listened when the judge tells me that he is the judge of the law and I am the judge of the facts. Here’s a fact…rather than be here most of us would opt for scuba diving in shark-infested waters wearing a pork butt bathing suit. Having done this for a few decades now, I knew to come armed with iThis, iThat and iMusic because this is easily the most boring day of the year. There is nothing to do and even less to see. Yet some are excited to be here as they have not yet morphed into the jaded cynics they will become. Two hours in, no air circulating and I am dropping into some kind of tepid air coma. A volcano could erupt in the courtyard and I wouldn’t have the energy to flee for my life. Those of you from out-of-state may not be aware but here they also tell us what to do in case of an earthquake and even those instructions are so tedious and boring they would put me to sleep if I was running from a napalm attack. With regard to the earthquake, my options end up being to either hide under a card table or a folding chair. One look at the card tables assures me that they would fold under a strenuous hand of solitaire and one is already missing a leg. Glancing around the room after they mention hiding under your chair I realize there’s not a single person in the jury pool that can fit under a folding chair. Even if there was an under you could fit in, we’d all look like hot dogs stuffed into doughnut holes. So, these options explained, I’m looking around for a pillar that can fall on me because I want to go quickly…I don’t want to be injured around this crowd. The jury pool is supposed to be a cross-section of yours and all criminals’ peers and, in this light, they have succeeded. You rarely see a cast of characters this diverse without having to walk through a Walmart. It’s like a casting call for extras in the new Spartacus meets Game of Thrones meets The Little Mermaid movie. It says right on my summons (in bold print and underlined), Business Casual Attire please and I must say I look pretty natty in my St. John’s Bay and Nike outfit but it looks like the majority of the pool conducts business from a futon in their trailer or out of a large appliance box under the Santa Monica pier. Since the jury pools are comprised from lists received from the DMV and Voter Registration, if everyone I saw votes this fall, I expect us to be singing Hail to the Chief to Kermit the Frog in November.
It’s not really that different in business. IMC will give you clear direction and assist you with everything from order entry to delivery. Whether it’s a product from our collections, our retail brands or a completely custom piece, we’ll tell you what we can do and then deliver the verdict. We’ll be up front and honest so you won’t need to hide under a chair waiting for your order. You can also follow your order as it moves from manufacture to decoration to shipping. And while we’ll sell you any of our quality products, we’ll also work with you to ensure the item is something that will showcase you and your client in the best light. We have a vast pool of product categories and a variety of decoration and shipping methods that will satisfy your client’s needs, making you look like a great judge. We invite you to view any of our 2,300 products from our IMC Collections like Orangebag or the IMC Collection, or retail brands like Waterford, Paper thinks and Kikkerland, with exciting new products and retail brands coming this summer. You can judge items suitable for any occasion and event and pieces you can use to build a reputation and relationship with your clients. We have promotional products for events, corporate stores and company programs that will keep your client coming to you for new ideas. And we’re always happy to offer ideas and provide case histories. So whatever your cause, event, launch or celebration, IMC has ideas and advice that will promote and support your client’s event. With 6 IMC collections and 28 retail brands, we have unique and quality products for all occasions and events. What do you think? Let us know with a comment here or on Facebook or Twitter. IMC wants your vote.